Thursday, November 6, 2008

Seek Ye First

As days get filled with countless activities and responsibilities, time has to be managed and some things get prioritized while others fall to the waist side. In any given day I have several hours of work at my job, multiple classes, the work for those classes, independent research, music practices or lessons, relationships with friends, family, and a long distance love. Everyone has their list, some people have families, children, some people commute long distances to make the money to put food on the table, many people have more on their plate than I. Nonetheless, with what I juggle I often feel overwhelmed. Sleep seems like a task. Speaking to my mom, my best friend, with whom conversations are effortless, I must make an effort. The work I do for school gets finished, but often by the early hours of the morning. Sometimes I feel burdened, but only by the quantity of things in my day. For the quality of my classes, my academic work, my job, and my relationships I am incredibly grateful. What troubles me is the lack of balance in my days. What has happened to my quiet moments, the inspiration in my life, time to exercise and enjoy the outdoors? These are the things that have fallen to the waist side. Since I failed to grant them time in the day, my days have seemed burdensome and more tiring.

While some may believe that balance is a luxury, I beg to differ. Balance is a necessity. It doesn't take much to realize that you control your life, your life does not control you. I know full well that I have deadlines and there are only so many hours in the day. It is mesmerizing the way the grind fools us into dropping those things in life which perhaps are most important, that keep us sane. I reach some days and feel like a robot. The grind eats away at me and it is as though life is being sucked from me. Eventually I shut down, useless to everyone, myself especially. Balance is a natural mode of Life. We see it in the seasons of nature as they each balance the other out. The universe is in perfect balance as the many tugs and pulls through planets and stars have their harmony. If I would surrender my constant agenda for several minutes and allow myself a few moments to listen to my own mind, or a half-hour to exercise my body, perhaps look up at the sky every so often life would feel more fulfilled for me. Great that I've figured out my own life plan, who cares, right? The point is that when battling a very busy schedule we all struggle to hold on to those things which are vital to our sanity. We push ourselves so far sometimes. Whatever it is that makes us feel inspired or that makes us feel better about ourselves is essential. The Bible says, seek ye first the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven is a state of mind, of being in sync with that which is bigger than ourselves, that which helps us make sense of ourselves and life itself. So whatever your kingdom is, seek that first. I guarantee it will make all the other balls easier to juggle.

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